I want to fly

It's frustrating when I try to approach things in a different manner but they still ended up in the same way. All I want is more comfort, less awkwardness and more maturity in the way that I respond when challenges hit me right on my face but it turns out to be the same. Sometimes, I think that there might not be any difference in the way that I act or response because in the end, I am pretty sure that I am getting to the same old conclusion. I don't know if I am doing it right as it seems like it's going down to the same road. It is the road that I didn't want to walk on. The road that terrifies me. The road that I was not ready to take. The road that does not bring me back to home. When I took the first turn, it seemed like I was going to the "unwanted" road. So, I reversed back and tried to take another turn but I feel like I am heading towards the same direction. In the start, I thought that the there are two different turnings that lead to different roads but now, I think was wrong all these while. I feel like stopping at my current position and take a flight back home. Well, I don't really mean Malaysia if you know what I mean.