Whatever..

I think it is very obvious to all that, nobody thinks alike..I know this fact..still, I am stubborn to believe it and apply it..

My mum once told me that she dislikes people who does not reply her messages or return her calls..When she told me the trouble and frustation that she has gone through because of those who do not reply her messages and calls, I understood what she has meant..there is no need for any further explaination because I felt that irritation and frustation as well..She told me that the replies meant a lot to her as they are indications of reporting back and informing the situation..I might not be able to explain them in words but I totally understand what was she trying to imply..

No matter how trivial are any messages or calls that I have received, I believe that it is important to reply them.. My mum's words had really impacted me. However, I think there is a drawback to this because I expect others to reply my messages and calls too! Here comes the frustation and anger! They simply do not reply those of mine! They do not think like me..

There was one time..it was long ago, my friend had received a message from another friend of mine..Because of her anger towards my friend in other issues, she did not want to reply the message..I was there..just right next to her..seeing her disobeying my belief..immediately, I told her to reply the message but she did not want to..I could understand the frustation of my other friend who is waiting for her damn reply! Sometimes, people are just so inconsiderate about what others may feel for their not-replying-act...sigh.

Recently, I have faced a similiar incident as well..the difference is that I am the victim, the one who waits for a non-existant reply! That message was rather important for me and it was urgent! To be truthful, I was mad and angry..I have waited all day long for a reply and I got nothing..Then, after a few days, I got a message from that same pathetic person..asking me a question that was rather important to her/him. To be honest, I had an intention of not replying to that idiot..hahaha..but I just could not help feeling sorry and guilty for my irresponsible act..So, I replied her/him after 20 to 30 minutes or so..I just could not betray myself! The guilt of not replying has controlled my actions! At least, I have the courtesy to reply! Unlike others who are so mean!

I know I cannot change this fact..I just need to accept that others are just selfish at times..

Whatever happens...I am just gonna be my true self regardless of what others may have done or might do about the replying-messages-issue...I just can't be bother by them any longer..I will always act according to what I think is right! =D

Time Shall Tell

This feeling.. I really don't know. I didn't think I was falling for it but I am starting to think whether I am. Sweet but I don't think it is sweet enough to start. What if my feelings betray my thoughts?

Is this real?

I admit I like to think about it. Sometimes this is the reason I giggled to myself. Then, I thought whether this was what I really wanted. Sometimes yes but sometimes no.

Someone told me that this feeling is hard to describe as it depends on how one perceives it.

It's so sweet.. I kept telling myself.

Can't it stay the way it is?

Maybe this is a new experience.

Something that I've not venture into before. It's a part of life.

Caring, sharing but not yet loving. That's how I describe it as. I am pretty sure this one is slightly different from the rest.

I've talked about it. Thought about it.

It seems that I like the way it is now. If there's any change in this, it will definitely be a serious one. Don't want to take the risk though.

It isn't that hard, is it?

No, it shouldn't be hard. I want to keep this a memory.

A happy one.

So, that I can laugh about it when I think about it when I'm old.

Funny. Naive. Wonderful.

I don't whether the other feels the same way.

Maybe not but I wonder if the other likes it this way. Time shall tell.

The answer lies in our hearts. If we really look into it, we will know what we want exactly. Just don't lie to yourself.

Hard part of Life

Now, i m busy with my application to US universities. It is so complicated...i kinda hate being part of it-meeting up the deadlines, writing the essays, filling up the details, etc.. I hope that i will be able to get through it..kinda tired of it..hahaha..

It is hard to decide which university to apply to coz there are many aspects to think of (eg, SAT scores, TOEFL scores, transcripts, recommendation letters, reports, mailing issues, essays, etc.). I admit I did broke down..coz I do not know how to get it done but I know that I need to get it done..I really dislike the process..and to think of it, I get headaches..haih

Everyone applying to the US is trying to be different. Then, I was thinking if everyone is different, then wouldn't different be common? Maybe common will be unique..So, wateva it is, I am just trying my best to be my true self..nothing but the truth..no lies..lol..

I guess it is best to just give it all I that I have within myself!

A Little Bit About Matriculation and More About Me

I am back home!! But only for 2 weeks.. The first semester of my matriculation program is finally over. A lot of people think that this matriculation program is the easiest pre-u course but after all I've been through, I am starting to doubt it. Well, never try, never know..

The life is hectic, tiring and stressful. I hate quizzes and lab reports. I think those are the only things that I dislike here. Oh, and doing everything on my own. haha.. how could i miss that?! Most of all, I miss my family and friends.

Apart from that, it definitely has changed the way i think and look at things. I start to think of good stuffs when I feel down. This is just to keep myself happy because life is not all we expected it to be. See the picture above. Something I found really extraordinary and beautiful there. :)

I met people of different attitudes and behaviour there too.It's true that everyone is unique in their own ways. I found a common thing in them though-hoping to get perfect scores. It can be pretty scary to come to think of it.

I used to be someone who is always worried over things and would get assignments done almost immediately. When I mingled with people here, I found more people are even more worried over stuffs than I do. They even got things done like in a split second.

If I were to rank myself there, I would probably be the average one. I am not like them because I am a slow learner. But still, I am not upset. I am happy that I could be myself.

I have made friends with some great people there. They are surely a different group of friends I've had. Another thing, most chinese speaks mandarin there. Some people found it awkward for a chinese girl like me not being able to converse in her own language. Lol.. I guess I am unique in my own way. Still, I thought it was important to get along with the crowd so I've decided to pick up in mandarin.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. Maybe God put me through all this to learn something valuable in life. Despite living in an environment I least favour, I kept reminding myself to stay positive.

God didn't promised that life would be easy but He promised that he would always be with us in our lives..