The Talentless Girl

It is said that everyone is special in their own ways and we all have that one thing we are good that. You're either the guy who can run really fast or the girl who plays a musical instrument. But the thing is  not everyone is someone who can sing beautifully or someone who can solve a rubic cube in a minute. What if we are just plain and ordinary? Or what if we can do a lot of things but just not so good at it? It takes interest, hard work and training to do these things I guess.

This is one tough question for me 'cause really, I'm just not good at one thing. But Ling and I are pretty good at games like boggle and crash bandicoot, a playstation racing game. Talented much? I guess Ling could use her art skills and drawings. Her handwriting is also neat and nice, better than mine. And hula-hooping! This girl used to hula hoop forever before I get my chance to hold that hula hoop for as long as 10 seconds. 

I don't have much talent to brag about. I can play chess and badminton but it's not like I am good at it or anything. Futsal was just a one moment thing in KMK. Congkak was okay but because I take a long time to count and yes, I count, it's frustrating to play against me. I can play card games like Cho Tai Tee and Ngau but that's it. Batu Seremban, wow such memories! Those days after exams in primary and secondary school. Not forgetting that I played in KMK and also once in UKM. Surprisingly, I was playing with the psychiatric patients and their family members. In UKM, I started debating but I wasn't like super good or the best kind of speaker. And that's about it I guess. 

Still the untalented person. I know a couple of things but there's no one thing that I am really good at. People in my school days would have thought of me as the brainiac or the smart one so it's completely understood that my talent was being in that position. I think life has more things to offer than just these. 

Maybe and just maybe I haven't found mine yet. 

For your information, I have been trying out swimming lately and hopefully cycling but it's gonna take time. I don't know whether I have said this before in any blog posts but I am gonna say it again. You know people say that you can't forget a skill like cycling. When you've learned it, you will know it for the rest of your life. That is untrue or it's just me losing coordination and balance after a long period of time. I used to cycle independently without those baby wheels but I fell when I tried cycling in KMK. :/

How it all started

To think of it now, I started this blog years ago, almost 4 years if I am not wrong. I started it off so that I can write my own opinions on anything around me but mostly, updates on my life..but as you can see, it is not working as how I envisioned it to be..and now, it got me thinking what it is supposed to be then?

I used to see this blog as a platform for my sister and I to voice out our opinions and talk about things around us since we were very VERY shy people. We weren't the most extrovert people you know. Honestly, we might even be considered boring and naive people when it comes to a lot of things such as the best books to read, fun things to do around friends, talking to people who we know but aren't that close with...and the list goes on. Because of that, we choose to be quiet..very quiet to the point where other parents think that we are the "goody" kids..haha. Yes, we were those kids who wanted to play with the other kids so badly but both of us were too afraid that we choose to sit on the couch quietly together. Unlike other kids who chose to run around the house and break the rules, we followed the rules and dare not break any of them.

As we grew older, we took notice of things like making friendly talks to people, entertaining other people by responding to them and starting conversations with people around us. We weren't good at all these and mostly, the both of us would even take turns since we are always around each other. The world seemed to be bigger than we knew it and we realized that we had to break out from our comfort zone (being together all the time).

Around the time when this blog started, my sister and I had the chance to break apart from one another. I wasn't used to it at all when we went separate ways. I guess we both realized that it is nice to have someone around all the time even though it might be boring because everything we talked about is more or less the same thing..haha. However, it is different now, we have our own stories to tell and we often looked back to those times. We don't even talked to one another all the time anymore. So, this blog turned to be our secret hide out..haha...shhh..

This blog started off with me being the active one and it slowly turns to be ours and now, my sister is the active one. By active, I mean the blog posts that are posted...;p It is funny to think of things you initially started and how it has turned out to be now.

The Runway to Final Year

That's Chris, my junior buddy and I in our very own college dinner. Fashionista Night was the theme for the dinner. Fashionista Night was last Saturday and it was after my 4th year finals which made it part of the relieving moments after the hard core studying for exams period. It was my very first time attending a college dinner since I always had other things to do during those dinners. Glad that I could make it for this one. :)

Anyway, I just got my results today at around 6pm. By far, this was the latest time ever the results were announced. Anxiety, palpitations, panic attacks, butterflies in the stomach, loss of appetite. Those were the things my batch mates and I had before receiving the results. I guess I felt the same but I was always trying to be positive about everything. I also was being very objective about myself because I knew what I did back there. Lol. I didn't think I have done a great job but it was definitely my best. Thankfully, I made it! :)

But deep down, I knew I was in deep shit. Everyone was like yay final year! I took a second and thought oh shit! Being a final year is like one more year to becoming a real doctor. I don't think I am any way close to becoming one. This is it? Here comes the most critical time of a medical student. Yay?

Apart from that,  I have friends who were still unfortunate to make it to final year yet and I am sure they would be able to. Been there done that, I know how much it hurts. It somehow felt like you're the worst ever student and sometimes you start questioning yourself whether you're gonna continue doing this. I did lose faith, lost hope and isolated myself but the most important thing was to be yourself. I had to fix myself. Such a mess.

I will be leaving for a Ni-Hao-Ma land soon. Should have practiced more mandarin when I could. Hello Taiwan! :D